A Mom to Many

Shadow of a familyWhen I married my husband, I made it perfectly clear that I wanted no children. I was career-focused and to be completely honest, children scared me to death. They’re weird little creatures, really.

After a few odd life changes, I gave birth to Oldman and Gremlin. I love those little weirdos!

J and I always wanted to be the house that the neighbor kids hung out at. Apparently a huge yard, homemade foam weapons, tons of wheels, and plenty of popsicles is all it takes to make that happen! Now I find myself 12 years into this parenting thing with more than 2 children. They all call me Mom and come to me for advice and love. This mother’s day, my heart is breaking for 3 of my adopted kiddos.

D1 (13 yo) has been with us the longest. She lost her mother 3 years ago to H1N1. She’s been in and out of court due to sexual abuse issues with an uncle and recently her older sister has run away and no one knows where she’s at. D1 longs for acceptance and love. The only other female in her life is her grandmother who is in the hospital with pulmonary edema.

D2 (8 yo) has been around for about 2 years. He is my biggest struggle. He lives with his grandparents nearby. His father only recently got out of jail (drugs) and his mother is still in jail. The judge won’t let him be with his father, which is good, but his grandparents have made it clear that they don’t want to raise a grandchild. D2 has issues with anger and goes to therapy for it. He also requires a heavy blanket whenever he starts to get too stressed out. He wants and needs boundaries. He needs a father figure, but is very open with me.

D3 (12 yo) is my newest one. He moved into the neighborhood after his mother died 2 days before Christmas (2011). He now lives with his dad and his boyfriend. The dad is not ready nor is he wanting to raise D3 and his younger sister and older brother. Food is not a priority in their house. D3 has a heart of gold and is at a critical place in his life.

All of these kids are loved and treated the same as my kids while at my house. If they eat dinner, they clean up. If they pull every bike or foam weapon out of the garage, they put it back. They help in the garden and I always make time to sit around and goof off with them.

Yesterday I overheard D3 tell Oldman, “Oh man, it’s Mother’s Day this weekend…”
Oldman: “I’m sorry, man…you going to be ok?”
D3: “Oh sure…I’m just trying to figure out what to get Mom…your Mom.”

It completely melted my heart.

How in the world did this happen? I’m floored yet so happy that I get an opportunity to speak into some kiddo’s lives that need a “Mom” in a bad way. Mother’s Day takes on a whole new meaning for me this year…I’m so much more grateful.

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