For quite awhile I’ve felt so much like Tootles. Remember him? He was the Lost Boy from the Peter Pan stories who had “lost his marbles”. Little did we know at first, that what he had really lost were his happy thoughts.
I’ve touched on this from time to time.
“I need to remember to count my blessings. Life is good for us right now. Life IS good for us right now! Dang it!”
But for the past 2 weeks I have been making a serious effort to find my Mojo. I’ve prayed, screamed, read, thought, laughed, and made bets. In my job, I work very closely with the customers. If they aren’t happy. I’m the first to know about it. If they’re thrilled, I may or may not hear about it. At times it doesn’t help with the finding of the Mojo. So during my 2 weeks of intense Mojo-motivation I listened to the Brookline Tabernacle Choir on the way to work. There’s a particular song about thanking God for blessings. Simple things, like waking up, seeing the sun shine, and mercy. It sets the mood of my day. It became my focus. I was/am determined to find blessings in my day. That means I seek out the blessing. I’m not just sitting on my butt trying to think of the blessings that came my way.
As always, there were hurdles. Trying to do this in the middle of a killer PMS week has it’s set-backs. That’s for sure!
I’ll be driving along, all in my blessings, when some nimrod pulls out in front of me.
Hypothetically, of course….I would lay on my horn only to remember that it sounds like a dying cow. So to show that dirtbag, I would flip him the bird (HYPOTHETICALLY…cause I don’t even know what finger that is…ahem.) and ride his butt so close it would hack him off the rest of the day.
That’s me. Ms. Edification.
The point of all this was to build a different habit. Because that was the only reason I could find as to why I was in the dump…why I couldn’t write…why I couldn’t enjoy life. I had a year’s worth of bad habits that turned me into a weird Old Tootles.
So now I think I’m on my way to finding all my marbles…my happy thoughts. Which means, this blog is no longer a burden. It’s going to be my journal again. I’m excited about it actually. It’s amazing what all I want to write about when I look at it that way.
I’ve got my diary back.