Coach Jen

Last night reeked of humliation for me…another night of soccer practice.

I’m thrilled to death that I’m not HEAD coach, but still.

I was running way behind so I showed up in my work clothes (which means sandels, not tennies).  Nuthin’ funnier than watching a middle-aged woman dressed up running around a field with a bunch of munchkins!

Coach Aunt Bea told me to grab the ball with the teams and go to the middle of field and start a game.  Sure, no problem.  How the hey-hoo do you start a soccer game?! I wasn’t sure but was winging it so that the kids wouldn’t laugh at me (I’m SO scared of 5 year olds!).  I grabbed a kid from each team, had them face each other and just about threw the ball in the air, when I realized that was basketball.


So I quickly put the ball on the ground and yelled go while I dove to the sideline.

Didn’t even phase the kids.

Phew….I’m still cool.

A few parents were giggling at me (or my sandels), but the kiddos were actually playing and they were kicking the ball in the right goals.

Now Coach Aunt Bea and I already know that one of the boys’ father was a soccer coach for 20 years.  That was so intimidating when we found out, but he added, “There’s no way I could try to coach a bunch of 5 year olds!”

Great! So, we’re one of the insane ones that got suckered in.  Perfect.

My husband got to talking to him last night and found out that he wasn’t just a coach he was also a player for some big time team…most of his teammates have gone Pro!!!!!  UGH! Feeling. oh. so. stupid.


I’m sure it’s great blog fodder for him, or at least I’m sure he’s got some hilarious stories to tell his old teammates.

If you’ll be near the area this Saturday, we play our first game.  Come and be entertained!  I promise not to wear my sandels.

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  • Well, honey, those weren’t just any sandals — they were you’re “hula-hooping Sue” sandals (another story for another time)!!

    WOOHOO! Go Orange Cheetahs!!!!

    You know, I guess we win, if 13 or so years from now on of the kids we coached (using the very loosely) went pro, we’ve got this Dad trumped.

  • You are still better than me. I didn’t realize you were doing a basketball start. 😉

    Don’t let that dad intimidate you. Ya’ll are the true heroes going out there and coaching these boys!

  • Hahahahahaha!!! Ya know, when you wrote that you had to start a game, I was all, “I would NOT know how to do THAT!” And you went and threw the ball up in the air. You are awesome!

    So… how’d the game go???

  • Just found your blog through Jenny (above). I have four kids who all played soccer and I always dreaded having to walk out on that field for anything. The worst was when they got about 12 and could really kick the ball. Ouch!

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